Happy Halloween, everyone! A brief glance at Wikipedia informs me that this mystical holiday has its roots in a Celtic festival designed to ring in the end of summer. Seems the old Irish used the occasion to prepare for the darker half of the year, and as such the occasion evolved gradually into a time during which Western culture collectively gazes into the night and whispers, “Ooh, spooky!” There’s something psychologically healthy about embracing the things that go bump in the night in a controlled atmosphere, joining hands and taking one fragile step into the unknown. For indeed, life itself is uncertain and filled with terror, so in a way we embrace our time on this planet by fully acknowledging every facet of it. Yes, Halloween is a wonderful, creepy time.
But apparently no one told my wife that, because as I write this there is an army of women crammed into our bathroom with her, making her hair do things which were heretofore confined to Renaissance paintings. The floor is thick with purses, of every shape and size, eviscerated of every beauty product they contained. There is enough hairspray in the air to stop a team of oxen in their tracks. I was paying attention to what they were doing at first, but when I found my toolbox had been retrieved from the closet, and several wrenches removed, I backed away slowly with my palms facing outward at belly-button level. This is not a thing a man was meant to witness.
Let’s face it: Halloween has become something more than just a spooky holiday. It’s an excuse to be free, a one-time opportunity to vent out all the fashion statements you long to make but know society wouldn’t accept. I’ve often felt that you can tell a lot about a person based on their costume. Halloween outfits trend towards three basic poles: exotic, deranged, and comedic. Most women I know embrace only the first, most men the last two (there are boatloads of exceptions, though). Whatever people do, I think it stems from the same basic urge: to expose oneself in a more profound way than normal life will permit. It’s probably best that such behavior is confined carefully to a single holiday, but it always reminds me of the Genesis passage where Adam and Eve rush to conceal their nudity. We are always putting on appearances in front one another.
Sorry, did I go all philosophical on you there, Dear Reader? Get out there and scare somebody, Happy Halloween!
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