I don’t like journals. I don’t like diaries. Many times in my life, I have attempted to keep them, but I disliked writing them and I absolutely hated reading the results. The whole thing felt forced, dragging my feelings out of my brain and dissecting them on a blank page was about the least comforting thing I could possibly imagine. Worse still, when I would put my diary down and walk away, I would feel a strange white noise in the back of my head, and it would continue to distract me for the rest of the day. If I saw someone I had written something about, whether good or bad, I would get distracted trying to talk to them. My diary felt like a running faucet, I wanted to do something to it. Eventually, I came to understand what that was.
I wanted people to read it.
As soon as I understood that, a great deal about my nature became clear to me. I am an entertainer, that’s just in my DNA, but I don’t think I appreciated until recently how deep into my psyche that part of me goes. I don’t just enjoy being on stage, I need it; it’s the only place where I’m really myself. I’m not capable of sorting out my issues in private, I can’t even tell what they are. But in front of an audience, whether it’s one person or a thousand, something in me clicks and I start focusing. The only journal that will ever do me any good is the one you all share with me.
Coming to this understanding has guided the development of this blog. I write my feelings, yes, but I do so knowing that my sole purpose is to entertain you. Rather than diluting or corrupting my honesty, this knowledge makes me even more daring, because an audience is the only thing I truly understand, and maybe the only thing that understands me. Most other social interactions are an annoying mystery to me.
Anyway, I mention all of this because in my quest to entertain, I’ve noticed another theme that this blog has been dedicated to: marriage. As a young newlywed, I have been exploring the fascinating, terrifying, exciting, surprising world of matrimony firsthand, sending back reports to the rest of you. I’ve gotten a huge kick out of it, I hope you have as well…
But it’s all over. Let me tell you why.
“Family Guy” has captured, in 43 seconds, my marriage. With this tiny little clip, they have more perfectly described the things my wife has to put up with than I ever could. Watch this little video, dear reader, and you have seen life through the eyes of Corelyn Marie Allen.
As a little background, Peter is obsessed with a song called “Surfin Bird,” which you’ve probably heard before (it’s the one that goes “ba-ba-ba-bird-bird-bird, the bird is the word, etc.”). He’s been playing it all day. That is the context.
Did you watch it? That is my marriage. That’s how it goes. I am Peter, Corelyn is Lois, that is our relationship. Even the look on Lois’ face is pretty much the one that my ever-patient wife gives me when I begin poking her nose and repeating something I find funny (yes, I have done that).
Hats off to you, “Family Guy.” All of my witty banter could not do what your simple little animation did in under a minute.
Stick around! Next entry, I’ll tell you about “Corelyn Games,” a series of mischevious practical jokes I routinely play on my lovely, suffering spouse.
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