Hello, dear reader. It’s your beloved newleywed Allens reporting again from Charlottesville. Before we get started with anything else, it should be pointed out that Cor’s mom is heading in for surgery this week, and although everything is expected to go smoothly and the doctors are confident it’s a standard procedure, prayers and thoughts are always appreciated. Cor is taking a few days off from work in order to be on call, but don’t be too impressed by her virtue; she looked *very* comfortable in bed as I stumbled angrily to the shower at 7 am this morning.
We had a very enjoyable weekend with our good friends from Alexandria, characterized mostly by casual nights out in Old Town and intense, sweaty competition on the Nintendo Wii, whose tennis simulator is a blast-and-a-half for four people. The satisfaction of actually swinging your remote to hit the ball back at your opponent is overwhelming, and actually a little dangerous, as all of us sustained whacks to the head from teammates standing too close to us. It was also a nice weekend as it gave me the opportunity to hand out the gifts I purchased for my groomsmen a few weeks back. Apparently, this is some kind of tradition, and even though I resisted it, Cor (who is notoriously generous with presents) demanded that I purchase some kind of rudimentary trinket in appreciation to all of my wedding entourage. I assured her that being in my presence was gift enough for them, but this, surprisingly, was not a compelling argument. So, having lost that battle, I decided to put a little extra in and got shot glasses with the engraved message “I Kidnapped Andrew Allen” on the front (a reference to their abduction-style bachelor party). Brady getting his is going to be a little trickier, but we’ll get it done.
Yes, we celebrated Father’s Day, and a lovely time it was. Cor and I met the elusive mom and dad at Chevy’s in Pentagon Center, a restaurant we frequented in our Tudor Place days after church, thanks to its proximity to Costco. I should scarcely need to explain to you that Costco trips were normally performed on the Sabbath, and while dad might tell you this was to save money on parking, the truth is that we Allens have always considered that big, beautiful warehouse to be a religious sanctuary, and trips to it were really more pilgrimages than anything else. One did not arrive at this destination to purchase mere *products,* but to re-fuel the Allen war machine, as it were; to continue everything that was Allen. We bought clothing, computers, batteries, detergents, bikes, furniture, books, movies, music, food, even jewelrey there. Ninety percent of all Christmas gifts given or received could claim descent from that mystical wholesaler. I’m about fifty percent sure mom and dad purchased *me* there. Everything came from Costco, and the nature of its origin was the subject of conversation for several reverent moments every time one of these purchases fulfilled its duty in daily life. “Nice pants, dadster.” “Yep. Got ‘em from Costco.” “I love Costco.” “Me too, Caroline. Me too.”
What was I talking about? You can’t get an Allen on the topic of Costco.
Right. Father’s Day. Chevy’s. We had a lovely time, margaritas, mexican food, and fond memories all around, and mom was gracious enough to pick up the tab for us free-loaders. We discussed all the glorious things that made dad so special, and laughed about the little eccentricities that have so endeared him to us. It was the kind of wonderful little blessing Cor and I will be so heartbroken to give up when we move across the freaking continent, but such is life, I’m afraid. I guess we’ll have to treasure it while we can.
Two moments stick out of my mind from this past weekend: the first occurred when Mike Gentzkow (the one and only) left his computer unprotected for a few tragic moments, and someone may or may not have made changes to his facebook profile which, among other things, suggested he had undergone a sex change operation to be “the woman I always imagined I was.” Thanks to the miracle of the facebook news feed, all of his friends were instantly notified of his new preference for Hillary Clinton, cute guys, and “Under the Tuscan Sun.” I couldn’t resist, dear reader. I simply could not resist.
The other was also at Gentzkow’s expense, although I am innocent of it. On the ride back from seeing “The Incredible Hulk” (which was decent), Zach and Mike were sitting peacefully in the back seat when the former was gripped suddenly by a transformation into what can only be called a “monkey-raptor.” This new abomination then turned its attentions on the nearest person to it. I’ve seen bad things happen to good people, but what happened to Mike in that backseat was just a crime against nature. None of us are strangers to this sudden onslaught, which is why it has long since been dubbed the infamous “Zach Attack.”
Many of you know I am a fan of the web comic “Penny Arcade,” which artfully depicts the best and worst parts of video gaming culture in much the same way that political cartoons go after Capitol Hill. I’m going to start including links to funny episodes from time to time, and I recommend you give them a shot. A few warnings: there is a lot of profanity and cartoonish violence, and some of the jokes will seem a little “inside.” However, you may be surprised to learn that every single advertisement on the “Penny Arcade” website is there because the site’s two founders, Mike Krahulik and Jerry Holkins, personally endorse the game itself, and it should go without saying that many lucrative marketing deals have been turned down in the pursuit of this ideal.
The strip stars Gabe and Tycho, unintentional but persistent avatars of Mike and Jerry respectively. The rapport they have is often described by the authors themselves as very “Calvin and Hobbes”-esque, with Gabe’s manic energy bouncing off of Tycho’s reserved elitism. Their treatment of issues within the video gaming world is second to none, and they are frequently listed as the leading opinions in their medium by magazines like ”Time” and “Wired.” They do not have day jobs, the comic pays the bills and offers them a very comfortable lifestyle, but they are both husbands and fathers. Gabe proposed to his wife on the website.
Anyway, here are a few to whet your appetite. Consider them fully endorsed by me.
http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2008/5/26/ (Gabe’s misadventures playing with a new “Horse Simulator”
http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2002/9/2/unwisdom/ (This actually happened, almost verbatim, but the roles were reversed)
http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2002/10/7/ (Gabe deals with being a minority opinion)
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